With college admissions recently being closed in India, there are several students who have struggled to make it into their dream colleges, while some succeeded, there are several who were unsuccessful. Did your child also fail to secure a place in their dream college?
As a parent, it’s heartbreaking to see your child struggle with exam failure. When your child faces this challenge, it’s essential to approach the situation with sensitivity and understanding. Here are five things you should never do when your child encounters exam failure, based on our own experiences and insights:
1. Avoid blaming your child: It’s natural to feel disappointed, but resist the urge to blame your child for their poor performance. Remember, they didn’t intend to fail, and attributing the failure to their habits or actions can lead to feelings of shame and emotional distress.
2. Steer clear of physical punishment: In the Indian context, this rule seems bizarre but it’s a non-negotiable! When emotions run high, some parents resort to physical punishment out of frustration. However, using force not only causes physical harm but also leaves emotional scars. It’s crucial to show your child that mistakes can be rectified through understanding and support, not violence.
3. Don’t compare your child: Now is not the time to mention ‘Sharma ji ka Beta’ and his achievements! Resist the temptation to compare your child to their peers or other high achievers. Comparisons can severely dent your child’s self-esteem and make them feel unwanted. Over time, it may even drive a wedge between you and your child.
4. Avoid labeling your child: Negative labels like “good-for-nothing” or “stupid” can be incredibly damaging to a child’s self-image. These words can lead your child to internalize these negative beliefs, affecting their future outlook.
5. Don’t cut off communication: In the aftermath of failure, it’s common for parents to withdraw and isolate their child. This can lead to feelings of depression and rejection. Instead, maintain open communication. Comfort your child, help them analyze what went wrong, and motivate them to improve. Remember that shouting and screaming only demotivate, and your child needs your support during this difficult time.
What is the takeaway?
Your child needs your understanding and encouragement when they face failure, especially failing in exams. Be their pillar of support, help them learn from their mistakes, and empower them to do better in the future.